For those of you who were keeping track and/or curious, I can update you on the Wife Swap situation.
We made it to the video round. That is, after filling out the excruciating application (which, to be fair, was a fairly valuable exercise in self-discovery), e-mailing many photos, and submitting phone interviews with the casting producer, they decided that they loved us. Who wouldn't, really? They loved us so much that we received instructions for making an audition video.
At this point, my husband, whose pragmatism saves the day every so often, decided that it would be a good idea if we actually watched Wife Swap. I think he watched about 10 minutes before he texted me to say that our reality television career was skidding to a halt. There was no way that we, purportedly upstanding and productive citizens in our community, could appear on this program. Acquiescing to my better judgment, I conceded that it was for the best.
My sister-in-law breathed an electronic sigh of relief in our direction. I must admit, I joined her.
So now what? I'm holding out for the sure-to-come new Broadway reality show: Gypsy: Let Me Entertain You. I'm cultivating the wrinkles and grey hairs to do it right, even as we speak.